I have heard it said that there are more men than women in the world.

I have also heard it said that there are more women than men in homes around America.

I have experienced first hand that there are more women than men in the church.

This represents itself in more women serving and leading in the church.

My pastor advised from the beginning that my biggest battle (and success) would be to attract and build a youth staff of male’s long term.

Recently I am realizing that as I look at my ratio of guys to girls in student leadership (3:7) how much all the above things are effecting even student ministry.

Today my wife and I were making some calls to market our grace (small) groups for the year as they start up.  I was having her call the girls and I took the guys and I literally had 2 for every 12 that she had to make.

I blazed through my calls but soon found myself thinking about the lack of guys in my ministry, guys in my church, and guys in the universal church.





Well yesterday Columbus, Ohio had 40-50 mph wind gusts that resulted in us being without power since 4PM yesterday.

(I am writing this from the church)

No TV, No internet.  We had to read books, talk to our neighbors, and improvise, it was chaos.

I think it would take about 5 days till people started looting and things turned into a scene from I am legend.


Crazy week full on ministry, soccer, and all in between.  This calls for some Mind Dump

  • Awesome week of HSM.  Atmosphere was high and first time visitor numbers were through the roof. Hope those people come back.
  • Where is everyone getting these black and white facebook pics with someone else’s head? I want to put my face on a beehive haircut.
  • I got one of the nicest compliments I have ever got since I have been in ministry.  Big Thanks to Nathan Pettit
  • Ever have a bad day where you have nothing but meetings and don’t get to get your to do list done.  I am so bad about caring too much on those days.
  • Couple a things I am praying about if you want to join me…
  • Praying about adoption
  • Praying for my brothers to find new jobs
  • Praying for a couple girls in HSM going through a rough time
  • Grace Group is tonight. It is week 2 and I already love my group.
  • My brother and sister (Danny and Jess) are coming down for the weekend so that will be fun.
  • JVB soccer game on Saturday. Gotta win!
  • My friend Jeff Beckley is an uber blogger now and was featured on
  • I recently found this blog and it is blowing my mind with what you can do with projection and walls/screens even on a youth ministry budget.
  • Time to enjoy the day off with the fam.  I already went on one wagon ride and as soon as Malachi wakes up I am sure there is another one around the corner.


Living a life of vocational ministry isn’t easy. Having said that I love it and can’t imagine any other life. I am blessed to be in a very healthy church environment that has my best interests and family in mind but that is not always the case. I have seen many classmates, peers, and friends who get thrown around and mistreated by expectations put on them by others or themselves and let the demands and pressure dictate their ministry. I thought I would write a list today of things that pastors have to keep in mind as they live a ministry life as husbands, fathers, providers, leaders, and shepherds.
Some of these will sound like no brainers, but they aren’t for everyone.
1. Always take a day off-Yeah ministry is a weird flex schedule and it can change (especially in student ministry), but even if it means that you give up your full Sabbath, take Tuesday morning and Thursday afternoon so you can stay balanced and have some time off and with your family.
2. Date your wife weekly-For those with wives there is nothing more important. We are pretty big about this one in our house. With a young baby date night has been a struggle but the expectation is still there. Sometimes it is better than others but as he gets older and we are freed up more and more date night will win out.
3. Put your family first-There are different ways to show this but here is how it is real in my life. I like my phone….a lot! Friday as I took my day off after a long, busy week, I wasn’t going to answer it unless the caller ID said “Jesus”. That meant that I got 1 voicemails, but it also meant that family and not my job was the priority in that moment.
4. Absolutely do not let anyone attack your wife or family-Like I said I am in a great environment, but that is not the case for everyone. I am not saying to attack those who attack you, but I will say that if you don’t protect your wife and family who will. If they are not in the wrong but still getting attacked you must as a husband, father, and leader of those attacking confront in love as Matthew 18 teaches.
5. Create a culture and ministry that is not dependent on you-Yeah we all wear 5 hats, from worship leader, to greeter, to head of chair setup, and lawn maintenance. The trick is that we create the culture and if we support a culture that puts all the emphasis on the pastor to be the man and do all the up front, professional Christian stuff, than you will burn yourself out and train your people to sit back and watch you and complain when you don’t meet their expectations. You are leading right when you are equipping people, replacing yourself, and can step away for healthy breaks.