RESPONDING TO TEEN DEATH/TRAGEDY

I shared in previous posts that this has been a tragic, blessed, and eventful week.  Powell and Liberty high school lost two students and realized that life on Earth is frail and doesn’t last forever.  I had some great opportunities alongside our other pastors and adult staff and students to walk through open doors and counsel, pray, and share out faith with people.  This week was nothing that anyone would have picked and yet had positives.

Someone joked with me that pastors always feel unqualified in situations like this and I must admit that is true. I heard time and time again from parents, administrators, and others that there just isn’t a manual for this sort of thing.

I was able to respond but to pretend I have ever gone through this before in ministry or will even see it twice a decade would be lie.  I did receive a little advice long ago about tragedy and so I thought I would roll that into my five things I learned this week to apply toward teen death/tragic community events. Hopefully this list helps anyone who may ever have to minister or lead as they face the death of teenagers and the aftermath with their students.

 

1. BE IN THE SNAPSHOT-This is the one thing I did have in my back pocket. I remember John Teevan telling me this while I attended Winona Lake GBC in college.  He said that people will not necessarily remember what you said or did, but they will remember that you were. Imagine that your response is a snapshot and be in the picture when they look back.
2. PRAY WITH PEOPLE-I had groups of traumatized students coming to me saying, “will someone pray with me? I just want someone to pray with me” before I could even meet them.  People do still value talking to God and want to do it.  Although they may not be seeking God day in and day out there is an undertone that still values prayer deep down in America.
3. OFFER YOURSELF AS A RESOURCE-I called the local high school the minute this happened and offered myself to come in and pray and counsel with students.  They seemed to value me and really opened up their doors to do what students needed.
4. BE SENSITIVE-Our ministry tried to make sure that we didn’t put our “ministry” agenda above others needs this week.  Even before we announced we would have a service that students could come to this Wednesday, we waited to see how the school would respond, what students needs were, and when calling hours/funerals would be scheduled.
5. RALLY THE TROOPS-Myself and our adults tried to really speak into our students and let them know how they could lead.  They needed to grieve, they needed to cry but we didn’t want to not let them know the opportunity this was too.  We told students that this was a watershed moment that we could exercise boldness, leadership, and influence in.  Don’t ever miss and opportunity to speak to potential so know you were clear and addressed what could happen.